How to Get Over Blogger’s Block: Terrible Advice from an Amateur Hack
I have blogger’s block. I’m brimming with ideas, but writing full sentences is hard. Like, MATH hard. I have several titles written, and two nearly completed posts that bore me. If my own writing seems dull to me, I know that it’s a snoozefest for you, because I’m an expert on
boring super important stuff.
I keep hoping to get hit in the face with inspiration, but I read somewhere that good writers write even when they don’t want to, or some other masochistic nonsense. I don’t want to squeeze out a dry nugget of uninspired bull pucky and post for posting’s sake. So what should I do? So far, I have a few ideas for comfortable, gentle relief from brain constipation.
1) Read other blogs. Not only does this distract me from my own arid imagination and/or incompetence, I can find great ideas to
steal expand upon.
2) Catch up on Facebook and Twitter. Both places are rife with fuel for my indignant fire. Nothing inspires a lively debate (a.k.a. one-sided rant) like an idiot and his/her uninformed opinions.
3) Drink lots of water. By doing this, I’ll pee a lot. It’s a scientificish fact that some of the greatest ideas were born on the toilet. I do some of my best thinking there.
4) Try getting some work done. Whether it’s at the office at a job-type job, or at home pretending that sorting laundry really matters, attempt to start or finish a project. Every time I do this, I am struck with genius lightening, and have to drop everything to start writing. Sacrifice all for the sake of blogging. Deadlines are just suggestions.
5) Troll. I like to find “experts” and “gurus” and ask questions in the comments section like “are you being ironic?”. When they say “what do you mean?”, I vaguely reply “that answers that question”. Arguing passionately with complete strangers is also useful. Finding creative synonyms for “moron” can really get those juices flowing.
Bonus Tip: Write about the inability to write. As a
jackhole blogging guru, I suggest telling people about the blockage. It’s a riveting subject, and even experts like myself will use it from time to time. Public whinging is very on trend.
Feel free to add your own inspiraxative. I’ll try anything once.